Looking back over 2016 with a ton of image. Get comfy and grab some snacks. (Seriously, I warned you).
OMG you stayed. But really, go get in your PJ’s and snuggle up cuz, this is a crazy long post.
I can remember hitting my late 20’s and people starting to inform me that things were “all downhill from here.” Unmarried, childless and without a ‘traditional’ job, slowly, even the persistent “when are you going to have children” or “you’re going to want to settle down soon” advice and well-intended courtesies stopped sneaking in. Shortly after being told I was completely unmarriageable by a stranger while laying naked on a massage table, everything/one gradually stopped sending me their wisdom.
Maybe somewhere in there were the little moments that things changed outwardly for me, or that I started to trust this path. I can honestly say that right now, sitting in a cafe while cold gray rain falls outside and people crowd around me catching up on the polite holiday chatter, I am more fearful than I have ever been.
It’s said that’s how you know you are doing something big enough – it has to scare you. Well, yes, right now, staring down the final clock strike to 2017, a proverbial clean slate, I am stone cold fucking terrified. New things are on the horizon, and they are not at all where my younger self imagined I would be, blazing head first into my 30’s, but they are admittedly so much more.
This year has been outstanding, despite all it’s shortcomings and tragedies, for me, it has been a tremendous year of self-awareness, growth, and fulfillment. So much so, much has my time has felt downright selfish.
Often, when I come back from a trip people ask where my favorite place has been – what my favorite moment has been – and it’s so very hard to put these things into words. For me, I try to take the time to appreciate and value every moment, place and opportunity therefor, ranking them can be a bit harsh. So instead, I am breaking it down with a bit of gratitude for each. Read and enjoy, or just scroll for some pretty photos along the way.
So, let’s break it down.
January:
Tampa, Florida: Speaking for the Sunday Supper Club on Photography.
Moment: Finding my voice. Speaking for the Sunday Supper Club at their Strawberry Event in Tampa, Florida was a blast. I was able to hone a talk about the aspects of photography that I felt were important and tailor it to the audience. It was the first item I was able to scratch off my 16 bucket list, as being a speaker at least twice was a top priority.
February:
Morocco. Huh. This one was different for me. In the past my out of country travel had been paired with working with a NGO, as part of The Giving Lens, so going for 14 days purely for myself, to better my own photography (and see an amazing country) felt crazy selfish. And yet, it was one of the best experiences I gave myself this year. The streets were busy, crowded and noisy. The energy of Morocco is one filled with life as people crowd the medinas, markets, and eateries with a chaotic slice of daily life mixed in with bustling tourism.
Moment: Besides the sandstorms and the snow angels? Standing under millions of stars in the Sahara desert. It was the instant that I knew I had the image I wanted. The moment I knew my camera. The second everything about years clicked into place like well-worn cogs in a timepiece, and I knew with the click of the shutter, the image was what I wanted and exactly how I wanted it. I’ve understood food photography, ISO, aperture, F-stops, lines, colours, light metering and more since I was working in a dark room in high school, and yet there’s always been doubt in my mind making me feel small, making me loathe my own work. Making me not love this thing I do, because I somehow wasn’t good enough. In one instant, that all changed and I absolutely loved my camera and whatever the image was that would come of that moment.
March:
For some reason, March is a blur to me, and I can’t seem to remember what I did or didn’t do (let’s be honest, probably slept). So, if I hung out with you, please refresh me.
April:
Canandaigua, New York. I joined the New York Beef Council as a judge for their culinary cooking competition where they invited several teams of culinary students from across the state to a 2 day event. We visited two farms and got some insightful insider information. Then the students were able to breakdown and use a subprimal beef rib to create a menu to enter to a cooking competition. Seeing how creative and inventive they were was inspiring.
Moment: On the bus ride from one farm to another, a young mother was explaining to me how hard it was for her to pull the hours she did at school, trying to become a pastry chef, attend classes and raise her child. She was slightly older than her peers and confessed she felt out of place. I looked at her, her drive, her awesomeness, the time she had taken out of that schedule to attend an event about beef when her dream was to bake, and told her how amazing she was. How, I imagined, her peers felt she was an inspiration to them for all that she as accomplishing and how nothing was stopping her from her goals. I learned something from her, and I hope, I inspired her to keep her head down and hustle hard.
I also found myself stopping to take portraits of the farmers we met and this little thing, a personal choice at the time, has blossomed into another big goal that I am looking forward to working on in 2017 and forward. Head to GirlCarnivore’s Instagram to see more about that.
May:
Orlando, Florida: Speaking with Denise Vivaldo at the Food and Wine Conference on Photography.
Moment: Connecting with so many wonderful bloggers again, and for the first time, was wonderful. I’d like to think I made a few friends for life here, and certainly loved the connections I took away from the event. Sitting with Lenny and Denise again after a few years since seeing them, helped me to put into perspective how far I have come. Oh, and Denise Vivaldo saying “donkey dick” that, that may have been my favorite moment.
Shenandoah, Virginia: Memorial Day Bike Festival with Buddy and Ben. (No lie, already invited myself back to this party for 2017).
Moment: After a crash that left me winded, terrible sore, and slightly nauseous, I still had to ride my bike back to camp. It was downhill for the most part, but I was unable to sit at all on the seat due to a blossoming set of bruises. Tears of pain were trickling slowly down my face, but it was going to pass, and I knew it. As we crested the turn to camp, my friends continued for another chunk of the ride, and I called it. I went down to the stream to sit and clean off. In the cold mountain water, I sat and cried. Shenandoah is a very special place for me; My mother’s ashes were scattered across these mountains. Having road one of its peaks, we stopping at the overlook and taking in the glory of these ancient rolling mountains, and I was overwhelmed. The lush greens, rolling fog, and smooth valleys of the Appalachian mountain range is one of the most stunning in the world. We bombed down, and I road impressively well for my doubtful set of skills, despite the crash(es). I was grinning from ear to ear from enjoyment of the moment and the accomplishment.
As I sat in the water and let myself have the time to reflect on the weekend, I was more proud of myself then I had ever been, and it sparked a new motivation in myself for more bikes, more adventure, more of this.
Bonus Moment: All of it. The mountain biking community rocks and my friends are some of the best people at motivating me and pushing me further.
June:
Murrells Inlet, South Carolina: I hosted my first photography retreat in Murrell’s Inlet, South Carolina with Alice Philips. We had six people total, and I made sure everyone had one on one time with me and their camera. It was sunny, stunning, and we cooked more food than I knew was possible.
Moment: Christie Vanover, of Girls Can Grill, looking up at me after snapping an image of her meticulously styled bloody mary. It was the moment things from the weekend clicked into place for her and the moment I knew I was doing the absolute right thing as a teacher. I fell in love with teaching workshops and am planning several for 2017.
Wilmington, NC: visiting Family. Nothing beats hanging out with my niece and nephews for a few days. They are amazing kidlets, and I am inspired by them every time I am there. A few days of personal time left me sunburnt, having played in the ocean for the first time in too long, refreshed and somehow exhausted.
Moment: So, that same friend, Christie, is also a park ranger for the National Park Service, and filled me in on the Junior Ranger Program. And being not at all the product of addictive personalities, I immediately set out on my Pokemon like quest of collecting every single Junior Ranger Badge. I walked into Moores Creek National Battlefield with my niece and two nephews behind me and told the bearded ranger behind the counter I was here for my badge. He asked what age, looking to hand out the workbooks to the kids, who range between 5 and 13. I answered with “I’ll be 30 in August” and he promptly slid the workbook for ages 13 and up across the counter to me. We got to work and spent the afternoon collecting facts and learning about this off the path historical spot. I left with my first badge, and a hilarious photo of the kidlets, myself, and the ranger as a memento.
Solitude Resort, Utah: After months of conception, Megan Keno and I met for our first blogger retreat at the peaceful Solitude Resort in Utah. During the cold months, it’s a jam-packed resort just outside of Park City, perfect for skiing all day long then snuggling up for a spiked glass of something warm and relaxing. In summer, it’s a blossoming, fresh resort with smooth mountain bike and hiking trails, killer views, and even a random moose (ok, I am pretty sure they don’t pay the moose a salary, but I was a non-the-less pretty stoked to encounter my first moose. However, I would have felt more comfortable if it had been less than 50 feet close. Luckily, I wasn’t aware this particular moose had two babies and the true danger I could have been in until I was long back from my hike and enjoying a cocktail.
Moment: After enjoying a few days together, we decided to do a very impromptu photo shoot in front of one of the restaurant’s front doors. We started with one headshot and quickly, we had everyone lined up. I worked on posing and directions, and Megan quickly snapped the photos. It was so fun and fast that no one had a chance to be nervous and it produced some great pictures. Getting to know the other bloggers who joined us on a more personal level was (and always is) a highlight as well.
July:
Atlanta, Georgie: Speaking on travel at Blog Life University (which by the way is an awesome conference and you should totally check it out if you are new to blogging)
Moment: Super embarrassing. I wasn’t expecting to be called on stage and had some errands to run. I was kicking it in my “Tacos, Tattoos and Tequila” shirt and capris when I heard them ask all the speakers to come to the stage. All. Of. The. Speakers. I had to sit and introduce myself between the crazy talented Jenny Melrose and Holly Freakin Homer (just to mention a few). “One of these things is not like the other,” immediately popped into mind when the mic was handed to me and I just rolled with it. Lesson learned, always rock a blazer over your classy ass shirt while on the floor no matter what ou think is on the agenda.
Wildwood, NJ: I swung over to Wildwood for a night to catch up with Chef Dennis while he and his wife were vacationing away from the heat of Florida on familiar turf, but – truth bomb – I’d never been to Wildwood, or rather, the Wildwood I’d been to wasn’t the same one as what this was. I’d been to a beach with boardwalks and crowded rides. Even as a kid, it was a little too much. This was a peaceful surfside village with a much calmer boardwalk and some seriously adorable houses. I may even kind of sort of want to go back.
Moment: Walking the boardwalk with Lisa and Dennis. The friends I have made in blogging have been incredible and just walking along the boardwalk taking in the nightlife was calming and fun. It was a perfect break between further travel.
Sacramento, California: I was able to head to IFBC (read food blogger conference) with the American Lamb Board. It was an unexpectedly fun city, and I enjoyed exploring the area.
Moment: Heading to a speakeasy with Kristen from Dine and Dish and Dan of That Food in my Beard. There were hundreds of conversations and moments on this trip, catching up with so many kick ass bloggers I have known and meeting some new ones in person, but really, that little prohibition themed bar was a complete break from the blogging scene and I loved every second of it.
L.A. / Burbank, California: I popped from Sacramento over to Burbank to visit Merry Graham and her family. It was the best add-on trip I could have asked for, even if I discovered L.A. really isn’t my scene.
Moment: People watching at Davey Wayne’s with Tiffany. I could have seriously sat there all night (what up, creeper).
Charlotte, NC: From Burbank, I hopped over to a Charbroil Event in Charlotte. On the drive from the airport to the event outside of the city, I noticed a stunning old oak tree, and suddenly why L.A. was lost on me, all made sense.
Moment: I was able to meet up with a few of my friends from my Cambodia trip. Seeing Donald, Steven and Brittany was excellent and reminded me just how epic that trip was. Cheers to random meet ups.
The behind the scenes tour the fine people of Lexington BBQ spontaneously offered me was pretty sweet too. Especially as the original owner pushed his grandbaby around in a highchair.
August:
Gainsville, Florida: I was asked to speak for my favorite beefy people on beef photography in Gainsville Florida as part of a two-day event. My schedule didn’t let me attend the full event, but flying down to give a talk and leave (ok, I ended up hanging out for a while) did make me feel pretty boss. Plus, I (weirdly) love chatting about photographing meat.
Moment: It wasn’t an entirely random guess when the taxi driver asked if I was a veterinarian, seeing as he picked me up from the animal science department of the university. The conversation that followed where he drilled down and ultimately discovered I was there just to take pictures of beef was horrible,uncomfortable and hilarious all at the same time, though he may not have thought so.
Lubbock, Texas: Highlight! The Raider Red Meat KCSB Cook-Off. A serious two-day event at the Texas Tech Campus
Moment: Meeting and chatting with the motivated and enthusiastic students and program leaders of the Texas Tech Meat Science department. These guys seriously inspire! Plus, the eats were pretty on as I sat in on judging the rib-eye cook off.
Austin, Texas: From one stop in Texas to another, as I headed over to Austin for another Charbroil Live Event and a day at the Lake Austin Spa. I Air BnB’d a tiny home for a few days to give the tiny life a run for my money, met up with Amanda from Fake Ginger, and ate more BBQ than any human should in a 4-day brisket binge. Worth it? Yeah, it so was.
Moment: A behind the scenes tour of so many of the BBQ stops. Seriously, Southern Hospitality is a real thing – and it lives. The platter at Terry Black’s BBQ was a true delight. And the breakfast taco at Valentina’s is a freakin must. (Look for a post soon on Austin Eats).
September:
Boise – Idaho Falls, Idaho: 2016 Idaho Potato Harvest Tour.
Moment: Besides being one of the best press tours I have ever attended, taking a flight in a functioning 1940’s biplane may be one of the coolest things I have ever done. Don’t get me wrong, the farms and fields and stuff were amazing, but seriously, I got to fly in an open plan over farmland with the autumn setting sun hitting the crops and bouncing off the colours in a spectacular way. See more about the Idaho Potato Harvest here.
Side note: Should you ever fly in an open biplane, tie your hair back. There is no brush or comb that will save you otherwise, and I sincerely considered chopping all my hair off once I realized the damaged I’d caused.
Bonus Highlights: Bike riding in Boise and an insanely great meal prepared by Linda and Devon.
Yellowstone NP and Teton NP: There aren’t words that can describe Yellowstone. As a photographer, I had a few spots I knew I wanted to hit, but my plan was actually to spend several days in Teton. And then I got to Yellowstone. It is one of those places that pictures do not do justice. I spent one full day on a guided tour with Latin-American bloggers (seriously, get yourself a bus of Latino’s if you want to have some fun) and then spent the next few days re-entering the park with an awesome friend just taking everything in. Guisers, viewpoints, cuddly bears (ok, stand at least 100 yards away and be in awe over cubs romping along with any other wildlife – duh), elk, coyotes, antelope, ram, and even wolf. YELLOWSTONE BINGO. I left with a whole new knowledge and respect for the park, and a new reading list of history and biological sciences that I wanted to get nose deep in. I left myself only a day in Teton and instantly knew those mountains would claim a chunk of my heart. I hiked, rescued a dog, snagged a junior ranger badge in a nick of time (which may have involved somewhat claiming the last remaining opportunity of the day at the last remaining badge from some impatient little kids, but hey! I filled out my notebook and rescued a dog!) and sat under the stars staring out at the peaks for a solid few hours before heading back to Jackson Hole.
Moment: Learning about 755M. There will be much more research done here, but I met a woman on an overlook who spends her time tracking the wolves of Yellowstone. There is a whole posse of people who do this all over, and I found it fascinating. I now have a retirement goal in life and want to learn so much more about this process. But for reals, moment? YELLOWSTONE AND TETON. (Plus 2 junior ranger badges – gotta catch ’em all).
October:
New York, New York: BHG Stylemaker Event and Rustic Joyful Photo Workshop. A full day with the crew of the Better Homes and Gardens Staff and bloggers at their annual Stylemaker event, in which, I decided I like drinking margaritas with Aly of Cooking in Stilettos at Agave and hunting for coffee with plant lovers. Then, after a crappy taxi driver dumped me who knows where, a mad dash in the rain led me to meet NoCrumbsLeft and BazaarLazarr in person and things were pretty epic. We ate (a lot) and slept in fancy bunk beds at the Wythe Hotel and life was pretty freakin Brooklyn Dreamy (making me wish I had a small fuji or Sony and shot exclusively in grainy black and white again) for a few days.
Moment: Phantom of the Opera followed by Shake Shack. Pretty sure that one explains itself and how much of an adult I really am
Davenport, Iowa: From potato fields to corn stalks, I covered a large chunk of diverse American Agriculture this year. I was invited on the Iowa Corn Tour with several other foxy ladies. Iowa was also beautiful in its own way and my few days there left me filled with wonderful conversation and insight on the corn industry. Read more about my weekend in Iowa weekend here.
Moment: Chowing down on french fries with Dick Gallager while we enjoyed a large family style meal.
Canandaigua, New York: I was lucky to bounce back up to Canandaigua for another Beef event, this time for food bloggers where I did a quick hour long talk on photography and got to enjoy the company of some of my favorite North East peers. The views of the Finger Lakes in the Fall weren’t that bad either.
Moment: Returning to 2 farms. I’d started this year in a very different place than I ended it as far as personal goals and growth goes, and unexpectedly, these two farms may have had a lo to do with that. To see the change in less that five months on these farms was impactful to drive home the passion on a future project.
Denver, Colorado: From one ranch to the Beef HQ, I flew out to Denver for hands-on training at the National Cattlemen’s Beef Associates HQ. One, how legit does that sound? Two, did you even know such a place existed? Now, how do I become an even better meat ambassador? #LifeGoals.
Moment: Roundtable discussions with a variety of influencers of the beef community. From ranchers, dieticians, scientists, to bloggers like myself, hearing the stories, reach and drive for each of us was fulfilling and helped remind me that this ‘blog’ (well, technically the girlcarnivore blog for that one) is the work I am supposed to be doing right now.
November:
Outer Banks, North Carolina: Photographing the piers, lighthouse, and sand dunes of the Outer Banks in November sounded fun when I signed up for it, but it’s pretty much as cold there as it is a home that time of year so it was not the sunny, warm destination I was craving. However, it was stunning and knowing Frisco Pier may not around for much longer gave serious motivation to land some stunning images of the decaying icon.
Moment: I stopped at Cape Hatteras to score another Junior Ranger Badge! Also, in discussion with a group of great photographers, I really got to delve into some thought on my personal vision with landscape photography (always a bonus).
Murrells Inlet, SC: Bouned back over to hang out with Ally in Murrell’s Inlet again. Because why not.
Moment: Watching Captain Don and Mr. Ben head out for a day of fishing on their little aluminum boat.
Wilmington, NC Visit: Bonus visit to see the niece and nephews!
Moment: Seeing the kidlets live in action at their jiu-jitsu class was pretty spectacular.
December:
Cuba: From Havana around Cuba and back to Havana for 14 days with a ton of familiar faces from Morocco and the bonus of having Denise and Lenny join too! Check out the photo tour I booked with here.
Moment: Maybe it’s because this trip is still fresh for me, but the moment is difficult to choose. I can think of several moments, but I think I left this one in a great place and a bad place somehow which is seriously #firstworldproblems, however, I can say that after two weeks almost entirely offline, I want to work on making that a healthy choice for myself in 2017. Less internet, less fixation on numbers and posting and random BS that doesn’t matter, and more time doing what I love, which is going to mean some epic hikes into who knows where, offline. As much joy there is in sharing, I have come to realize my best moments are my personal ones that I wouldn’t share and I need to give myself the time and opportunity to accept more of those moments into my life.
New York, New York: a whirlwind one-day holiday tour – right before Christmas with my friends Andy and Kristen. Yep. Elf inspired. Go on, judge me.
Moment: PIZZA! Ok, well, walking through the Christmas markets was amazing. Seeing the tree. The light shows. The window displays. The life that is NYC…. But seriously, the pizza at John’s was worth the train ride alone. (anyone else wanna go on one day NYC eating tours with me?)
Other events in 2016:
After ten years, and with a broken heart, my relationship with Captain Blue Hen Comics as the manager ended, however, hopefully, it will always be home.
Started shooting for Dollface Studio, and couldn’t be more excited about it. Seriously, book now. So fun.
Started helping The Giving Lens with Social Media. Hint hint wink wink check them out too if you are considering a rugged, more authentic photo tour with a worthwhile cause.
Lost my boy and a with him, a piece of my heart. Marble was the best friend a girl could ask for from the very first moment we met and his unexpected, yet peaceful death was an unexpected sucker punch. He left this world with grace and dignity, much in the way he performed every day. He will forever be my boy, and though there will be others that will enter my heart and be loved, he will never be replaced.
With that ability to stand back and glean a fuller perspective on 2016 I can shake off the feeling of negative that has crept in. Perhaps the fearful sense of change and an unclear path are trying to hold my ego in check and force me to compromise – to settle. Maybe, it’s just the season or the year catching up with me.
A friend called the other day spontaneously. Intuitively, she asked how things were going, and I ended up confessing a barrage of bad news. I felt horrible doing it, even in it admitting these personal tragedies, I felt awful, because my year had been fantastic. She took a moment to speak on each of the events and things that had happened, validating my emotions on each event. She assured me I was allowed to feel joy and mourn my losses all at the same time and there was no guilt or fault in either. She told me to give myself grace.
And that is how I am going to be starting 2017. I am giving myself grace. Grace to feel all of the things I need to, to be terrified and exhilarated, to take uncertain leaps and not know how or where things are going to lead. I am giving myself the mercy for change, opportunity, opening doors, and working on feeling that I am deserving of the abundance I have worked for and the possibilities that whatever this unmarried, childless, 30-year old beginning can be.
See you on the trails.
Awesome post Kita! I was very happy to be part of your year. I’m up for a trip to NYC anytime!