Nothing was as fun as peeling back the lid on those individual pudding cups after school. Now, I am a big kid and wanted something with a little more grown up flavor for my afternoon snack. These individual salted caramel butterscotch pudding recipe were the perfect creation! The smooth pudding has just a hint of vanilla infused with the flavor and the creamy caramel sauce on top just makes it feel more decadent. No one thinks of pudding when they are looking for a fancy dessert. Hand them one of these and with that first bite, watch them be reminded of those fun after school snacks and impressed with just how far pudding has come since then!
The other night a woman I respect who was celebrating a momentous birthday looked at me and said that she wishes she could be me when she grows up. That I have my shit together, and I do the things I set out to do.
I sat in shock.
I wanted to crumble and cry. Less than 12 hours later, when the dishes were done from our dinner party, and I had worked out, I stood in my kitchen heart rate pacing and panic pulsing through me without any reason. No justification for it, just a splash of overwhelming anxiety. My dogs had run through my freshly cleaned kitchen in the classic wild puppy scene smearing mud and who knows what from end to end. Today I am stretching pennies as far as they can go and trying to figure out how to put gas in my car until the next check comes in. It’s the joy of being freelance. I am sitting in my back room at my full-time job juggling emails and real people trying to buy comic books, trying to whip up a post for a client and put the finishing polish on an email blast and someone just texted me asking if we could have a conference call in 20 minutes. There are so many trains of thought I don’t even know which one to throw myself off of right now without colliding with another.
I do not have my shit together.
Not one bit.
But I try.
Every day I get up, put my head down and work harder than I did the day before. I dream big impossible thoughts and have found there are a few other crazies out there that dream big crazy thoughts too. I focus on tasks so hard and strive to make them perfect that I lose sight sometimes of the whole picture. I chat off the wall ideas with new friends that have the same passions as me. I break on Tuesdays for coffee with other entrepreneurs just to make sure I am not too far gone. I endeavor for perfection so much that I miss out on all the small wins that get you through. Needless to say, I am an all in kind of gal. And that can sometimes be dangerous.
Tomorrow I am launching a huge personal project. Something I have wanted to do for a while. I am terrified and sick to my stomach over it. It’s going to be a ton of work and hours and commitment and I just want to be sure I am giving it everything I can. But I know, if I spend days they will turn to weeks trying to perfect it, instead of just taking the action needed to make it work. Tomorrow is the first step. The rest will work out as it needs to. I hope you join me on this adventure. . . . #dreambig #popupfoodieworkshop #breath
The other day while huffing it at the gym, I was listening to my nerdcasts and the woman quoted something she’d heard, “Have the courage to find the grace along the way.” She was talking about how she can bravely enter into new risks, take on new challenges with all of her heart without worrying about the perfection of it. She launched her business without a full plan, knowing that it had to work. This is a theme I see over and over again.
Knowing it has to work and to figure it out along the way.
I am a hardcore planner. I like data, analytics, charts, timelines, instructions. I want to know how everything is going to go 5 minutes before it happens. But it holds me back, slows me down. While searching for the why, I am missing the now. Figure it out along the way. It just sounds so carefree and effortless. It can’t possibly be that easy. But, I am tired of missing out.
For years, people have been asking me to teach them how I take photos. I always brushed it off, not having the personal self-esteem to believe I was good enough. I made excuses. I didn’t believe they really wanted me.
Now I am trying it.
Today I am nervous, terrified, anxious, sick to my stomach to announce that I am launching a passion project. (Insert a dramatic drumroll).
A photo posted by kita roberts (@passthesushi) on
The goal is to team up with amazing creatives around the country and host workshops for food bloggers to hone their skills and get people learning hands-on how to use the tools they have to become more successful bloggers!
The first official one is on the calendar for June 12-14 in Myrtle Beach South Carolina, (go on, click through for the details) and it is focusing on photography and styling. I am teaming up with the amazing Mrs. Ally Phillips of Ally’s Bohemian Kitchen to create an intense workshop for 2 1/2 days! We are going from start to finish full on with tips on creative styling and shooting several different recipes, honing in and developing the style that fits your brand, as well as offering one on one sessions and an open Q&A and peer critiques. Most of all, it’s going to be a fun supportive group of people to learn together with and support as you grow!
Oh my god guys, it’s going to be awesome! If you have been struggling to embrace your camera and master its potential, please check this workshop out! If you can’t make Myrtle beach, subscribe the newsletter and stay tuned for upcoming pop-up workshops!
For right now, if you need me, I will be breathing heavily into a paper bag,
but hey, I made you Salted Caramel Butterscotch Pudding.